How can I support my Friend with a Mental Health Problem

When a loved one is suffering with a Mental Health problem, it may sometimes feel difficult to know how to best support them and you may feel as if your letting them down or not being a good friend. Mental Health difficulties may make some people feel vulnerable, which may cause them to withdraw or isolate themselves from others. Sometimes it may be difficult for the person to express themselves. Try to remember as much as this is a transition and new experience for you, it is also difficult for the person experiencing the mental health difficulty.

Below are some tips of how you can support a loved one suffering with a Mental Health problem :

  1. Provide a Listening ear
  2. Don’t judge
  3. Check up on them
  4. Let them know you care
  5. Try not to get frustrated
  6. Be patient
  7. Research information for better understanding
  8. Don’t try to change them or rush their healing
  9. Uplift them when you can
  10. Be creative in your communication e.g. create affirmations, do small gestures (it’s the smallest things that count)

I hope that this post was able to help or inspire you to help out a friend who maybe in need. Shar x


I want to come off my Medication

Medication can sometimes be prescribed to patients when Mental Health problems, to help mange how they are feeling and feel able to function in their day to day lives.

Sometimes people may be responding well to the side effects of their medication or they may feel like they have had enough of being on medication for so long. If you are one of these people and you want to stop taking medication it is advisable to speak to your General Practitioner (GP) first before coming off prescribed medication.

It’s important to be aware that your GP should always be the first point of contact and in case of an emergency dial (999 – UK). It’s important to have the conversation with your GP about your views on your medication. Further discussing why you would like to come off medication and if they can support you with this process. Coming off medication with a immediate effect may be detrimental to your health, as this should be a process (weaning off medication) with the support form your GP.

Please speak to your GP of you what to come off your medication. Try not to make any immediate actions before, consulting with a medical professional. I hope that this post was able to help or inspire you, in relation to seeking help for medication. Shar x

My Mental Health at Work

Most of us spend the majority of our lives at work, which can combine between, full time, part time, agency or shift work. Sometimes it can be easy to forget about your Mental Wellbeing at work when your so focused on your career and your goals for the future. In saying this it’s so important to take care of your Mental Wellbeing, because Mental Health problems can affect your daily functioning (social and occupational). If you feel that your Mental Wellbeing is deteriorating, hopefully this post will help you look into taking care of this situation.

Let’s use an example;

Your in an amazing Full time job, great pay (bills are covered), fun colleagues (good social life) but your responsibilities are very demanding and causing your stress, making you feel mentally drained, ill and your not feel like yourself lately. What do you do ?

Focusing on this example, the most concerning element is, your job making you feel ill, mentally drained and your not feeling your normal self. Sometimes you may get these signals and think nothing of this, but generally this is your trigger for yourself, telling you that maybe something needs to change. Something that you love doing, in which you are skilled in shouldn’t be making you feel ill or mentally drained because this then defeats the purpose of your hard work.

Below are some steps that may be able to help you think about the next steps you could take if your having trouble with the example above or something similar.

  1. Reflect on how your job is making you feel (write down your thoughts).
  2. Write down the pros and cons to how your feeling.
  3. Is how your feeling impacting your work performance.
  4. Have others started to notice and decline in your performance.
  5. Think about how long you haven’t been feeling like yourself (feeling ill) and whether you are managing this appropriately.
  6. Have you thought about communicating how your feel to your manager or occupational health.
  7. Are you aware of your employments healthcare policy.
  8. Have you tried speaking to your General Practitioner.

Going through there steps may help you to reflect and think about possible ways you maybe able to help yourself. It’s so important to not suffer in silence and to reflect every so often on how your feeling. Always remember to keep in touch with yourself and be kind to your mind. Pay attention to any change that may be detrimental to your health.

Thank you for reading, I hope that this post was able to help or inspire you if you maybe experiencing difficulties at work. Shar x

27 Lessons from 27 years of Living

(In no particular order)

  1. Love yourself first
  2. Always take care of your self care
  3. Be honestn
  4. Be happy
  5. Create the life you want to live
  6. Stop making excuses
  7. Just do it
  8. Stop comparing yourself to others
  9. Be different
  10. Learn from others
  11. Read Read Read Read
  12. Look for the positive in things
  13. It’s ok to have a down day
  14. Surround yourself with people who lift you up
  15. Take every opportunity
  16. Have no regrets
  17. Develop yourself daily
  18. Never be afraid
  19. Remove the word can’t from your vocabulary
  20. Reflect on yourself and how you can improve
  21. Appreciate your life
  22. Stop looking for excuses
  23. Don’t take things to personal
  24. Master your craft
  25. Take control of your emotions
  26. Travel
  27. Believe in yourself even if others don’t

I hope you enjoyed reading this, feel free to share some of your lessons 😊. Shar x

Therapist Diary – 05 – Dealing with Negative comments

Everyone is different and have different life experience which make them who they are as an Individual. Certain people will behave how they have been taught to by others or from their own experience. Something that I’ve been experiencing quite a lot as of recent is, people having something negative to say, whether it’s a little comment or phrase and it’s annoying (for those who know what I mean) but I’ve been able to manage it and I would love to share this with you all.

Sometimes I think to myself, why do these people behave like this and at first it use to annoy me, but i learnt by becoming annoyed I’m lowering my frequency and allowing them to control my emotions. This all changed when i changed my thinking style, so now whenever someone has a negative comment to make, I just ignore them and continue with whatever it was that I was doing. Before I would always comment back which would alway start a debate, why did you say, why are you like this or this is what I mean about you blah blah. With the other person then trying to justify their reasoning, for their behaviour. Reflecting back on this, i’ve just wasted how many minutes talking about something that is unnecessary and pointless.

Don’t get me wrong I understand that we have a balance of emotions and sometimes we may feel low or happy on different days. However speaking negatively or also having to make a silly comment is just not necessary.

If your someone who is struggling with this or who doesn’t know how to mange when things like this happen the best advice I would give is IGNORE these people. Save your energy, time and focus and ignore them and sooner or later they’ll stop and if they don’t that’s something they will have to manage themselves.

Thanks for reading. Shar x

My Mental Health is destroying my relationship

Relationships are so important to us and we often place loved ones close to our hearts, but sometimes relationship can be difficulty to maintain, when you are suffering with a Mental Health Problem.

Mental health problems can be very distressing and may sometimes cause people to have a negative views about, themselves, others and the world around them. It’s so important that if you are struggling, that you have the right support around you and people who can help you in times of need, although understand this maybe difficult at times. Sometimes you may notice that your Mental Health difficultly is destroying your relationship with loved ones and you may notice, that you’ve been withdrawing or isolating yourself. Depending on what the situation is communication is always helpful, sometimes others may not know how your feeling and may not know the best way to support. However if you try to communicate this with them it opens opportunities for situations to be appropriately managed.

This doesn’t mean that you have to go around and explain to every person what’s going on with you, as this may seem very daunting. However if you try to communicate this with your close loved ones it maybe helpful for them to be aware of your situation. If you can’t find the words to speak or not sure what to say, speak form the heart and try not to worry too much how it comes out (read my post on, the art of therapy and everyone has a story).

If you have noticed that you Mental health is destroying your relationship try speaking to someone and seeing how this goes. Let me know how it went if this is you. Thanks for reading. Shar x