How to get back up when you’ve been feeling down

Lately I’ve been feeling soo drained but my momentum is slowly building back up and I know I will get back to the place when I was feeling 100%. I feel motived to write this post because I feel like this is the current state that I am at in my life at the moment, so I’m writing from experience which I always do but this is fresh and based on how I’m feeling at this very moment.

Let’s make a start…There will be some days in our lives when we are feeling low and drained, especially if you are putting to much pressure on yourself or your feeling lost in your thoughts, ruminating about things. This post will hopefully help to encourage you to get yourself back up and start over again, regardless of what day it is or what no. attempt it is. It could be attempt 199 it doesn’t matter, what matter is that you try your best.

The first step in helping you to feel motivated which will help you find yourself again is, being able to identify what caused you to feel this way in the first place. Once you can Identify why this is, it will help you move a step further. Always pay attention to how your feeling and when you may have noticed a change in your behaviour, thoughts or feelings. There maybe many reasons why you began to feel low and that’s ok, nobody can judge you for this because we all have these moments, but take some time to identify why. Reflect back to the time when you wasn’t feeling how you are today and what you may have been doing differently. It may be years, months or even days when you noticed the change and that’s ok, identifying the cause (trigger) can help you move forward. In life we can all relapse or lapse, it’s normal it’s expected, don’t put to much pressure on yourself and take you time. You can only go as fast as you let yourself.

The second step once you’ve identified when, why, how you got to this place is working out where you want to be and how you can motivate yourself to get there. Below are 3 tips on what I believe may help you achieve this.

1. Write a letter to yourself

Writing a letter to yourself can make things seems more real and current, in this letter you can include where you are now and where you wan to be in the future. It’s ok if you don’t know how your going to get there, because tomorrow is not promised for anyone, but if you plant the seed for your tomorrow and have an idea of what you want you can water your seed and help it grow. Watering your seed helps Aline your plant with the reality that it will grow and flourish regardless of what it may look like now. Writing where you are now can help things sink in and help you gain clarity of your thoughts. You may find that your not in a good place now, but have an idea of where you want to be and this will encourage you. When writing this letter take your time, don’t rush and be patient with yourself. There is no right or wrong way to write a letter. Just write what comes to your heart and what feels good to you.

2. Write down some Positive Affirmations

Positive affirmations are my go to, when I need that extra boost to help encourage and motivate me. When writing your positive affirmations it can be helpful to start with I AM, so your confining it to yourself and speaking it into existence. Positive affirmations should be statements that help uplift you and encourage you.

3.Write down your Goals

For me I believe that writing down goals helps give you a senses of direction or where you want to go and what you hope to achieve in your life. Goals help give structure to your lifestyle and most importantly help you learn more about yourself.

I hope you have enjoyed reading these 3 steps as they have helped me, when I’ve been feeling down and hope that it can also do the same for you. I hope that this post has inspired you to feel motivated and encouraged when you may be feeling down. If you have any ideas that you want to share with me leave a comment below. Thanks for reading Shar x


Stop Judging others and be Kind to their Minds

The world would be a much better place if people learn to stop judging others for their individual differences. There are millions of people on this earth from different walks of life, been brought up differently, taught different things and exposed to different events and situations that make them the persons they at today and add to their story.

Within today’s society, it feel like it’s become the norm to criticise and stigmatised people when they are low and vulnerable, then wonder why suicide rates are high or why Mental Health problems are constantly on the rise. Sometimes it’s not about the problem but how we treat the individual with the problem. Learning from others is the best way to make progress and find solutions for ongoing situations. When you judge others you make the problem worse, for them instead and that’s telling them that you don’t care.

We need to learn to accept people for how they are and not judge them, based on the chapter of their life you walked in. The year 2015 was one of my worst years of my life and if you meet me then, I most definitely not have been the person I am today.

So this post is a gentle reminder for people to think before they judge others or have something to say about another persons life. Your judgement can be damaging for a person and could be the final straw for them, so be kind to other people’s mind and spread love and happiness.

Thanks for reading and if your one of those people who judge others think before you speak and ask yourself would you like to be judge in this way.

Spread love and Happiness. Shar x

Therapist Diary – 05 – Music is my Therapy

Music has always been my therapy, when I feel low or not quite in the mood when I play some music (slow Jamz) and this helps uplift my mood. Now some people may think that slow Jamz are sad and emotional and yes some songs are but for me I feel like these songs make me happier (not sure how the artist will feel about this). The reason why music is my go to and very therapeutic for me is because throughout my childhood music was always played in my household. I grew up on music and music was always associated with happiness, love, laughter and celebrations (so disappointed that I cant sing).

One thing I would love to get into and most likely will when I have enough time would be Music Therapy. I would love to be able to help inspires someone through sound. Also that just reminds me that, there are other types of music that Jealous me therapeutical not only slow Jamz but classical music. This type of music helps me feel soo calm, this particularly works when I’m in my car, when something on the road is irritated me or has annoyed me. I definitely believe that music has the ability to change people’s Mental Wellbeing and I would love to know more about this.

In life It’s so important to find something that helps keep you sane, particularly when your feeling low or need to have some time with yourself. I hope that you all have something that helps you therapeutical when you feeling down or lost.

Thank you for reading this post, I would love to hear some of you lots therapeutic healing treats for yourself. Shar x

It’s ok to ask for Help

You are Strong, Brave, Ambitious, Courageous and Beautiful. When times get hard, remember that you do not have to suffer in silence and isolate yourself.

In life it is ok to ask for help, or to admit to yourself or to anyone else, that you are struggling or you cannot cope with things in life at the moment. Many people have days of feeling when their feeling stressed or unable to cope. Being honest about how you feel, does not make you a weak person, because it takes strength to be honest when you are feeling vulnerable and admit when your finding life challenging.

Mental health difficulties may impact on your daily functioning and sometimes you may feel like, you can’t manage and cope alone and its ok to say you need help. In life you are not going to know and have the answers to everything and there are people in this world who will know some of the answers to the things you may not know or need help with. We are a community and a culture (smiles) and we are here to help each other. If you notice that you are struggling with anything in your life mentally or physically never feel ashamed to say “Can you help me please” because it’s by seeking help that you are able to grow within yourself and potentially help others. We all have knowledge and skills worth sharing.

Positive Word Search

n s c h n g c r y b
v u a w e s o m e e
h o j m l g h j s a
s i h g I f t e d u
a t t f d g y j b t
r i d l o v e g l i
n b d b v f x i e f
a m u q d u g k s u
h a p p i n e s s l
d f v x m n n t e g
s w e e t y u r d b
e a c x h g i o f d
h k i n d w n n k l
s x r h b o e g a w
g h f e t u i k i y
g q t c a r i n g u

Love                                  Caring

Happiness                           Funny

Strong                                   Awesome

Beautiful                              genuine

Be well                                 sweet

Kind                                       gifted

Funny                                   blessed


Good luck and let me know how many words you find x Shar

Finding Peace of Mind

Finding peace of Mind can sometimes feel like the hardest thing to do particularly when the world around you is so busy. When your head is filled with so many thoughts, your head is spinning and you can’t think straight, trying to find peace can feel so overwhelming.

You may notice that even if you try to find peace of mind, with all that’s gong on around you, you may start to have second thoughts, begin to second guess yourself or start becoming worried and anxious about the next steps in order to achieve this. If this is you, try to challenge these thoughts by saying something positive to yourself like “I can do this, I owe it to myself.”

Finding peace of mind can simply be having some time alone by yourself, just sitting down in the bath relaxing in silence or sitting alone in bed with some candles and peaceful music. Finding peace of mind can also be engaging in an activity, doing something that puts your mind and body at rest. This can simply be going for a walk, doing some exercise, yoga or even dancing to your favourite music playlist. Whatever it is that you find to help you have peace of mind, ensure that it is something that makes you smile and feel happy at all times. Finding peace means something that is therapeutic to your mind, body and soul.

Here are some tips of how you can find peace of Mind

1. Think about any hobbies or interest that you enjoy doing, try to get back into doing these.

2. Think about how these hobbies or interest make you feel.

3. Try and see if you can schedule one of these activities in your day to day life even if it’s for 10 minutes.

If you find that your can’t think of any of the above

1. Try and find something you’ve never done before and give it a try.

2. Step out of your comfort zone

3. Do a little research to help gain some clarity.

I hope that some of these steps will help you in finding peace of Mind, if you are struggling in this area. Give this a try and let me know how it goes. I would love to know how you got. Better yet if you like share some of your ideas that help you find peace of Mind already. Shar x

Is it Stress or Mental Health Problem

Thinking that you may have a Mental Health problem can be very distressing and confusing. Particularly if this is the first time you are having these thoughts, or even if this may not be the first time and you’ve always had an idea of this it can still be troubling.

Before I continue I will explain the difference between Mental Health and a Mental Health problem. We all have Mental Health however we don’t all suffer with a Mental Health Problem, this can be triggered by various external situations or events that happen your life.

Mental Health – Mental Health is a person’s state of emotional wellbeing. Your wellbeing is linked to your tolerance of stress levels and how you mange dealing with adversity

Mental Health Problem – Mental Health Problems refers to a range of Mental Health conditions, that can be triggered by external situations or events. When a person is finding it difficult to manage stress, or daily functioning this may result in a Mental Health Problem, which can affect your mood, thinking behaviour and how you feel physically.

Before you start to think that you have a Mental Health Problem, it’s also important to understand what stress, because chronic stress could trigger a Mental Health Problem, if not managed or treated accordingly.

Stress – Stress is a feeling you may experience of being under too much pressure.

Stress can sometimes feel like a Mental Health Problem, due to the symptoms being similar to depression and anxiety. Stress can sometimes make you feel unable to cope or manage your, thoughts, feelings and behaviour. However if you have the right tools stress can be managed.

How to identify if you are experiencing stress:

Step 1: Write down what you think is the problem

Step 2: Write down how this problem is making you feel

Step 3 : Are you able to mange this problem if you have the right tools to help you.

Step 4 : Ask yourself how long have you had this problem for (has it been longer than 6 months)

Step 5 : Don’t rush when doing this exercise, try and take you time going at a pace that is convenient to yourself.

If you feel that you are able to manage what has been causing you to feel stressed. Below is some practical problem solving tips that will hopefully help you.

How to manage stress with Problem Solving:

Step 1: Write down the problem

Step 2: list as many solutions you can think of to solve this problem (anything that comes to mind, it can be as silly as you like)

Step 3: list the pros and cons to all the solutions you have just thought of and number them form 1-(no. of solutions). With 1 being the most likely solution.

Step 4: Pick the suitable solution

Step 5: Make a plan of how you are going to utilise this solution

Step 6: Take action

Step 7: Reflect

If you have followed this steps above and believe that you are experiencing more than stress. Here are some examples of how you can maybe identify if it is more that stress. Try not to self diagnosis yourself with anything, as it is advisable to seek professional and get an assessment if you need further. However being able to identify how you are feeling is important and will help when being assessed by a professional.

How to identify if you are experiencing a possible Mental Health Problem:

(Disclaimer, I am not a Clinical Psychologist although I have qualifications within as a Therapist, I am able to assessing, providing suggestive diagnosis to patients. I am also experienced in providing treatment for low level Depression and Anxiety based on this)

– Mental Health problems, may have an impact in either of the following, how you feel physically, your thoughts and behaviour.

– Your symptoms, may cause significant clinical distress or impairment in social and occupational or other areas of functioning.

– Mental health problems generally last for a period of 6 months (this is dependent on the problem)

The 3 signs can help you identify if you may be experiencing a Mental Health problem but always seek professional advice.

Thank you for reading this post. I hope I was able to make things clear for you, in being able to identify whether you maybe experiencing stress or a Mental Health problem.